health & well-being | Dynamic People Engager

Jun 22

0

What the doctors don’t tell us about women’s health and body issues…

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, self esteem & self confidence, women's life changes and transitions, Written Articles | No Comments

We have an amazing privilege to live in our bodies, and “giving ourselves over to the experts” may not provide the solutions to our woes. In my work with women, who have experienced difficulties with fertility, miscarriage loss, post-abortion healing, eating disorders and weight issues, body dissatisfaction, depression and intimate relationships, there are some things in common, which are often things that the medical fraternity may not have considered, discussed or ventured near. Also I know how addressing the underlying stuff, rather than applying the band-aid has made for huge, life-changing transformations for the women I have had the privilege of supporting. Try this on!

1. Many of our women’s health, body, weight and womanly issues are influenced by a loss, change, trauma, abuse or grief that occurred when we were developing through puberty or in critical times of change and transition in our development as women. Such “hard stuff” sits in our bodies and we often create a story about our bodies and ourselves from that situation – consciously or unconsciously. When we rewrite and heal that story, things change for us.

2. Our “secrets” are stored in our bodies. We need to reveal our secret, and let new healing energy flow into our bodies. Food, medication and whatever else we stuff into our body will only stuff down the secret and the emotions. This will create other “unwellness”. Find a caring, compassionate person to reveal your secret to and get the support you need.

3. Our own “knowingness” – a.k.a intuition – knows the best thing to do for our health and well-being issues. We know ourselves more than any other “expert” out there. When we truly get honest with ourselves, and stop the B.S, beating around the bush or half truths we give the “experts”, we really do know the causes and underlying factors of our “issues”. When we sit still and listen, we have the answers ourselves. This can save us lots of angst and loads of dollars!

4. Our body gives us very obvious cues. The problem is we don’t listen. Start listening to the cues of hunger, fullness, pain, illness, libido, wellness, stress, desire for exercise or requirement for rest, the desire to help others and the yearning to have “me time”, the desire for soul nourishment and creative fulfillment and the cue to stop sometimes. Medicating, mind-numbing substances and activities, certain treatments and procedures and diet regimes dull our natural, in-built and highly acute cues!

5. Our body, mind and soul are one… In my experience, connecting with our soul/spirit is the place to start for any of our body or health issues. Stillness is key. Letting go of control is also important. Watching for signs is useful. Reclaiming their femininity has also helped many of my clients resolve their womanly issues. Faith can move mountains, and a “possibilities way of being”, beyond what we have known in the past is possible, will lead a way for miracles to occur.

Want some help you apply these principles? Let me help you finally become the beautiful, empowered woman you are and reclaim your health and things you really want in your life. janelle@janellefletcher.com

Jun 15

0

How to stop pigging out in the pantry, and practise soulful self-care instead

By janellefletcher | health & well-being, self esteem & self confidence, Uncategorized, Written Articles | No Comments

Get yourself of our the “chaotic eating /non eating cycle” once and for all! Eating is an emotional experience – in a positive and negative light. Staying stuck in weight and poor eating and exercise patterns are all feeding you in certain ways – filling the void in most cases or squashing emotions down. For me personally, it pays to find ways to satisfy my soul, not fill up my stomach, because I know the cycle I can get myself into when I eat too much, get annoyed with myself, say ‘bugger it” and abandon all acts of self-care! Here are some ideas to get YOU started in soulful self-care, rather than pigging out in the pantry. How do I know this stuff? I got myself out of 11 years of that chaotic eating and non-eating myself and haven’t been back.

• Name the emotion or situation that leads you to your undesirable eating, drinking or “falling off the self-care wagon.” For many women, it is loneliness, anger, creative hibernation, feeling unsupported, resentment, exhaustion…What’s yours?

• Find an outlet to release emotions. Like with the coke bottle, when you continue shaking it up, it will eventually explode! In such cases, this explosion may end up in a massive food binge, an exercise “walk-out” rather than a workout, and other unhelpful behaviour. Recognise that emotion next time and immediately try out a different response.

• Stop dieting Diet is quite literally “die” plus a small cross on the end! When you limit and deprive yourself, at some stage you will kick, scream and rebel. Your body cries out “feed me” and your willpower tries to ignore it or overpower your body’s cries and such conflict can set up the “never-win-cycle” of yo-yo dieting, fluctuating weight and body dissatisfaction.

• Start listening to, and honouring your body’s physical hungers. How often do you override a stomach grumble, headache or other hunger-pang sign because “it’s not the right time to be eating, it’s not on the diet plan or I should wait for dinner mentality”? We have a built in system that tells us to feed ourselves, how much to eat, what to eat and when we are full. It lets us know what exercise makes us feel great. It tells us when to stop and rest. Listen!

• Create a soul nourishment menu and start “fulfilling up” on a daily basis. Draw a round circle on a piece of paper. Cut it into 8 equal parts. Sit in stillness for 5-10 minutes. Ask your soul what it needs to help you feel fulfilled. Slot those into the “8 pie-pieces”. Be as specific as possible. If it is music that soothes your soul, what type of music? When do you like to play it? Do you listen to music or do you play it? If it is being with people, who are they? Where do they like to meet? What are you doing with these people? If it is a creative outlet, what medium are you using? Is it solitary or in a group. Is it for work or pleasure?

• Remember how eating can be a pleasurable experience. Be fully “present” at mealtimes, rather than eating on the run. Sit together with your family. Turn off distractions. Cook something interesting. Eat slowly and taste the food. Set up a beautiful table. And as the French would say as they indulge in the pleasure of food, wine and good soul-nourishing company, “Bon Appetit!”

Jun 08

0

3 reasons why you shouldn’t give up and throw in the towel yet

By janellefletcher | health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, Written Articles | No Comments

Given up on what your soul is crying out for – like a peaceful family, a fabulous relationship, a service you wish to offer the world or a creative dream you may have? Feel like what you really want is NOT round the corner and is eons away? Feel like you have no more ooomph to wait another day for a door to finally open for you?

I remember clearly the years when I was alone and I was still hanging in there to find Mr Right again. I know very well the years I have put into my business with loads of closed doors and a few fleeting opportunities. I despaired for months sometimes about my kids and wondered what else I could do to make things better for them. I have cried out to God/Spirit many, many times (you can hear the angst in that!) in search for my place on this earth and for things I was asking for to finally arrive.

Following my darkest days of feeling alone in my life (when I was 14-24 and from 40-47) , I simply had to surrender into not doing it on my own, not trying to work out how I could “make it” and not trying to control the circumstances of my life and happiness. It was in those deep, soul-searching moments for my place in this world, that I formed a relationship with Spirit and started what I call “constant conversations”. So what do I mean by that?

It means when I need to make a decision, I ask Spirit and my special friends and family who have passed, to help give me the sign – a yes or a no, a red “wait” sign or go-ahead green light. When I am feeling alone, I ask for companionship. Sometimes that comes in the form of an unexpected phone call, a text from someone I haven’t heard from in a while, a “success story” and thank you from a client or a feeling of peace, when indeed I am alone with no-one else around. When I don’t know what my next step is, I ask for guidance and I simply watch what appears in my thoughts, in my gut, in my surroundings and in my day-to-day world and I follow that. I guess I can say I follow my life now (with a companion), rather than lead my life alone.

So why shouldn’t you give up?

1. You were purposefully put on this planet. Yep, one day we finally have to get that there is no-one else like us! We think others are out there doing the same things as us career wise for example, but no-one is like us! We think there is another “chick” out there who would better suit a particular man – but that chick may not be destined for him. The perfect person might be you! Even through the hard stuff – eg relationship hassles – perhaps we are the perfect ones to be learning what we are learning from them (and their “faults”!) and giving the other person exactly what they need to be learning at this time by living with us through our “good, bad and ugly”.

2. A miracle is often around the corner How many times before I finally met my new french man/lover did I see the signs – an interest in the French rugby team, french market, french music… but not the French man himself? I could have easily given up and settled for my ‘second best” options – which were in fact there! What I needed to do was decide I really deserved my heart’s total desire (not second best) and had to “give up” any ideas of a relationship with these others and wait! Once I had let the other “options” go, my soul mate appeared. Stop settling for second best, put your heart and soul’s desires firmly out there and be patient, watch for the signs and sit in the faith and the comfort (sometimes discomfort!) and see the best for you revealed. It’s about unwavering faith and deservedness my friends. And sometimes the miracle is in a different and even better package than we ever imagined which would not have occurred if we hadn’t waited.

3. Our dark days often light up more clearly what we really want When we rant and rave to the universe about what is causing us worry and despair, we often get clearer ideas and more focused on what we really DO want. Nothing like a good old rant and “clear-out”! Cry, shout, let it all out…in the solitude of your own company or in a constructive activity that helps you release those pent-up emotions. For me, it has been in those moments of intense emotion and outburst that I have become crystal clear! It is also when my answer or my desire has turned up on my plate!

May 04

0

5 keys to breaking free from your cage of “not-good-enoughness”

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

Yes, people can “put us in a box” but often it is we (yes YOU and I !) that cage ourselves into that prison or cage called “not-good-enoughness.” If we hold the belief that says, “We need to be more…” or “We aren’t good enough to…” or “We could never have…”, that is our doing, not someone else’s. Let’s be responsible! We locked ourselves in that cage (or at least have moments of hanging out in there), and we have the keys to get ourselves out of there and experience life with new “wings” – a.k.a awesome relationships, working in a job that is our passion, feeling fit and fab in our bodies, enjoying hot sex and intimacy and/or feeling creative and successful.

So here are 5 of my own keys that got me out of my cage – some of them might even fit your lock! If they don’t, don’t flutter around in a frenzy. Instead sit still on your perch for a bit and let your inner knowing tell you what will help YOU fly in the way you were born to.

1. Remember what delighted you as a child and reignite that. From a very young age, I did not sit still. I tapped my feet. I loved to dance, and moving and grooving is “in my blood”. When I don’t dance, I feel stifled. I reignite this now by being fully expressed in my body – whether I am exercising, speaking, making love or simply hanging out. What you loved as a child, is intrinsically who you are, so start flying around in those passions again.

2. Remember what your dreams, visions and beliefs for the world were as a child and reignite those. I loved autobiographies of people who made a difference in the world – for those who healed, who served, who offered hope and who inspired others to find ways through their hardships and to step up. I had a natural inclination to be with people who felt different – disabled, old, fragile, poor, disheartened…. I dreamed of traveling and being with people from different cultures. I choose now to live my own autobiography inspiring women in their transformation – from a natural, feminine and spiritual perspective. I continue to travel and always will. What you have dreamed about, envisioned for the world and believed in, you are prepared for. “Be the change” as they say, but you can’t do that from a cage!

3. Find your own rhythm. There have been times in my life where i have been super-busy – sometimes out of what I thought was necessity, but much of it was to “prove” myself to either me or someone else that I was “good-enough”. Nothing wrong with having things in your life. But for me, slowing down and simplifying really feels more like me than when I wore the “superwoman” cape. Achieving loads of stuff in a short amount of time does not necessarily equal “you are good enough.” And remember, the most efficient flying often doesn’t happen by loads of flapping of your wings.

4. Flock together with others who believe wholeheartedly in you and who love you for who you are and who encourage you to be in your total awesomeness. Sometimes this means not allowing certain people to hang out in your flying space. Sometimes it means flocking with new groups of people. Sometimes it might mean migrating to a new house, new flat, new job or a new country even! My motto is, “If I feel light in this company, “flock” (=group of people), or location, I am in the right place.”

5. Good enough-ness is a choice. In any given moment we can choose the thoughts, words and actions that align with good-enoughness or not-good-enoughness with vastly different outcomes. eg. “I am big, fat and ugly and have nothing to wear out tonight. I can’t go out! This choice leaves us talking to our four walls, feeling sad, depressed, lonely and probably hitting the chocolate biscuit container. Versus,” I have clothes that really suit me, my body and my personality. I love that and I can’t wait to see what awaits tonight, who I meet, what I will do and what opportunities open up.” Yeehoooo Our choices in each moment lead to entirely different outcomes. Choose mindfully. But also “carry your body” in a way that embodies that choice.

So take action now. Let me and others know an example of how you have “caged yourself’ in in the past, and share one strategy that has helped you break free of that. Others will love your ideas and wisdom.

Apr 26

0

Caring too much (Uber-caring) and being “NICE”

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

Inbuilt within me is an undeniable urge, desire and need to care about others’ well-being. I care. I am compassionate. I want the best for people. I want to make life easier for others. I want them to have a smile on their face. I want them to feel at peace with a situation. I want them to feel happy, content, and simply cared for. All respectable and honorable qualities, but let me give you a low-down of how sometimes my care-taking of others has not been about “care”, but more about my own lack of self value and self-appreciation.

Let me give you some great examples which you might relate to.

I cross town at my own time and expense to give my kids some valuable time with their friends. Yes caring, but equally comes from my esteem which says “If I say no, they will make a fuss, or they won’t like me!”

I go out of my way to help an exchange student learn English to study well and pass his exam. Yes indeed caring, well-meaning and yes I’m a great one to teach English. But again I notice this is sometimes for my own gain. That I helped him. That he didn’t “fail” whilst under my roof. That his homestay experience will be viewed by his parents and him as “successful”.

I spend money on something that I would deeply love for myself, but instead spend it on another for their pleasure. Perhaps if I was dead-honest that will be thankful for the experience and my generosity.

I care about my partner’s desire to spend time with me, and I will sacrifice some jobs and errands that need doing or deny myself of catching up with a good friend, in order to show “I care.”

As a write I get this incredibly sad feeling in the revelation that yes, I do appear caring, but deep within me is a deeper need to be accepted, to be viewed as kind, compassionate and self sacrificing. I am also fully aware of the expectations my “caring” sets up and the resentment I sometimes feel when my Uber-caring has meant my own body.mind and soul needs have been sacrificed. I also get that by Uber-caring, I don’t do others a favour. It doesn’t allow them to step up in a different way, nor does it allow them to grow whatever they need to develop within themselves.

So checking out the words of Winnie the Pooh, Is it LOVE for others, or lack of love for self that has me/us uber-caring? As a past coach of mine put it. “NICE” – is not about being nice, polite and fitting in. “NICE” is the acronym for Not In me to Care Enough. In other words, we appease. We put others’ needs, wants and desires first. We stop allowing others to fend for themselves and develop new skills. Perhaps we just need to stop being so NICE.”

Apr 14

0

People – Pleasing position or self respect position? It’s your choice!

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

People pleasing usually has the connotation of someone running ragged around others – filling up the other person’s “needs and wants tank” over and above their own. It has the idea that you are adding something to your to-do list that benefits others and leaves you with less time and energy for yourself. It no doubt, gives the impression of an exhausted person, with little or no fuel or substance in their own tank.

But people-pleasing is not always about what we DO do for others.

What I have noticed is what I DON’T do sometimes that also keeps me in the people–pleaser position. I sometimes refrain from saying something I really want to say for fear of disapproval or backlash. I sometimes don’t request someone to do something for fear of being told what a nag I am and how unfair I am. I often find myself saying “no” to an activity or event I would enjoy, whilst saying “yes” to someone else’s wish-list event. I may not bring up certain subjects because they might cause debate, rather than keep the peace. I may not do certain things that could make me look a certain way in someone else’s eyes.

When we DON’T do such things, what happens to us? We lose ourselves. We become someone we are not, We become a puppet – manipulated not by just another person, but more often from ourselves. We lose our “voice” and self respect. We become peace-keepers, rather than offering others (and ourselves) a different perspective or new learning. We may become resentful, insular and predictable (perhaps even boring!) We may not allow ourselves and others to experience what we need to experience at a soul level. At a physical body level, we may fester, grow and find interesting ways to manifest and release what has been dampened, pushed down, refrained from, hidden and denied – in the form of ill-health.

So how do we authentically be who we are without doing all the people-pleasing routines? Here are just a few questions that I personally find useful.

When you say Yes or when you say NO, run it through this filter. “Am I saying or doing this to please others, or because I genuinely wish to say/do it?” Align your actions or answers with what is your REAL self, REAL desire and REAL THOUGHTS or VALUES. Learn to say NO. Learn to say YES. Know the difference and create some changes accordingly.

Do I care more about other people’s opinions of who I am, or more about my own self respect, self awareness and self love? Self respect is a win-win for everyone. People-pleasing is a win-lose and possibly even a lose-lose.

What can I (and the others) gain from me valuing myself, my time, my opinions and my input when I am being genuinely me?

And just a few things that I am personally learning.

Conflict is not always bad.
We educate others how to treat us. Sometimes we are responsible for others using and abusing us.
“Me time” and “putting me first” is not selfish. It is self–giving that has an outward beneficial flow on effect.

Mar 24

0

Dealing with the s***

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

This week I have encountered many people have been dealing with a lot of s***. My acronym for s*** is this:

S…eriously
H…ard
I…nviting me to hide under the duvet
T…roubles

Some have been dealing with troubles in the financial arena. Some have been standing under the relationship umbrella – none, bad or wishful thinking scenario. Others have been tired mothers or busy women juggling a zillion tasks and the things that go along with parenting or caring for elderly parents. Another was struggling with how to be herself in relationship when she feels like she is often being knocked down. Another was dealing with the prospect of taking someone to court for sexual violation and what that would entail for her. Some were complaining about physical complaints and their body’s changes in perimenopause.

Two common threads I see in all of this is CHANGE and IDENTITY.

CHANGE in that the situation is calling for us to adapt, modify, re-evaluate, try something new, resource ourselves, reprioritise and renew something.

IDENTITY in that we are being called to really challenge ourselves on the strength of who we are, the abilities and skills we each have, our determination and commitment to be valued and an opportunity to put our needs, wants and desires at the forefront.

So I am thinking on the spot here and perhaps can change the S*** acronym to something empowering. Here goes!

S…ource yourself with an ally – friend, coach, Spirit, God, angel, mentor, accountability partner, church, support group or someone who can really help you. Stop trying to do it “all on your own”. Another “S’ is STOP. In the busyness and bedlam, we will not get our answers. In our stillness and silence, we will.

H…ave the commitment to align yourself with ways and approaches that fit who YOU really are. If the medical route doesn’t feel right, try something alternative. If loaning money from your parents doesn’t feel right, find another means by getting inventive. If you normally wouldn’t ask for something out of fear, embarrassment or you “simply don’t know something”, empower yourself by asking for what you need to move ahead strongly. If you want to make change in the world for you and others, stand up and have your voice. If speed-dating or internet dating isn’t your thing, mix and mingle in groups that share a common interest with you.

I…nvite change into your life as a friend, not an enemy. There is nothing more inevitable than change in our lives, yet more often than not, we tend to see the dark side, rather than the light. Questions to ask ourselves, rather than fretting, worrying or wishing a magic wand could be waved over us could be these. “What gains and “positives” is this change bringing into my life?” “How can I nurture and nourish myself as I go through this experience in my life?”

T…rust. This has to be the biggest “biggie” for me that I have learned through some very difficult times. Trusting in the perfection of the “highs” and “lows”, trusting the perfection of Mr Right and Mr Not so Right. Trusting that the health problem is asking you to re-address how you deal with your emotions, care for your body or nourish your soul. Trusting that sometimes the financial pit is the starting point for getting inventive and creating your own change for the better.

So side-step the s*** and clean-up your act a little. On that note, the sun is shining so I’m heading outside to nourish my soul!

Mar 07

0

A “Chocolat” moment and how a simple ribbon can open up our connection with others

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

This morning I had another “Chocolat” moment. You remember the movie “Chocolat” where the woman and her daughter arrive into the very conservative French town and she opens up a chocolaterie? As she helps her “clients” choose their particular favourite chocolate morsel, she opens up the possibility for them to really share and heal what is going on in their lives – from loneliness, domestic violence, finding love and breaking out of religious conservatism, as examples.

My “Chocolat” moment was this……smiling remembering my day yesterday working in our French cafe Pyrenees here in Auckland. As a part-time job alongside of my coaching/healing work, I love the opportunities that the cafe opens up for me to truly connect with people and to help them open up and feel listened to, supported, encouraged and inspired. Yesterday the simple act of a ribbon around a box of french “food delights” provided such opportunities.

1. A women arrives most days. She always enters slowly, head down and with a very sad demeanour. To date I have welcomed her with little response from her. Yesterday I noticed a glimpse of a smile or “lightness” in her that I hadn’t noticed before. It gave me cause to remark to her about that and really ask her about her day. With her coffee in hand and a croissant, which I wrapped in a simple white box with a ribbon on it, she told me she had been daily visiting a friend who has terminal cancer. I could sense her relief in being able to share this moment and it allowed me to really encourage and admire her in a brand new way, rather than see the “solemn” exterior which I had previously noticed in her.

2. A young man arrives and checks out the gateau section of the cafe rather nervously. I described to him the beautiful rich and adorned chocolate and passion gateau – a small, shareable gift of food for someone. I could easily have rung up the purchase on the till and said my “Au revoir”. Instead I enquired further. It was for his girlfriend to celebrate her birthday. When I suggested we “put a ribbon around the box” to make it look pretty – my comment being “girls love this kind of thing!”, he shrugged and said “Nah, she’ll be right!” – a great kiwi expression! I intuitively decided to ribbon it up anyway. When I returned he beamed with pride and walked out with a skip in his step!

3. A mum and her daughter arrived – apparently the girl was having a “sick day”. Perhaps sick, but perhaps also wanting to simply take a day off and “hang with mum”. When they ordered, they were thinking about dashing away and eating on the run. I suggested that they might just want to “chill” together on the cafe sofa and enjoy their time and food together. Instead of simply putting their patisseries on a plate, I gift wrapped it up and delivered it to their table. The simple ribbon allowed an almost sacred moment for this mother and daughter to connect, in what I hope was a memorable moment.

My “ribbon lesson” or “Chocolat” reminder is that people love to feel special. People love to connect and be heard. People love to celebrate. People love to chill and not be busy. People love to be acknowledged and recognized for their kindness and compassion. People love the opportunity to connect more intimately, but often need to be given the opportunity. Like Juliette Binoche in Chocolat, I am not in the cafe to sell coffees. I am there to LOVE people.

Mar 03

0

How to feel at peace, when you are not feeling peaceful

By janellefletcher | health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

Interesting kind of day today with not a lot of things going “right” and me noticeably feeling a little frustrated, annoyed and edgy. A client didn’t arrive. I couldn’t gain access to my blog.. I managed to pick up bruised fruit and had to return it to the shop. My son needed help with his homework while I was trying to get my own work down. I was missing my partner and wanted him to be home early. And I have a whole load of other little examples, which left me feeling rather jaded.

So how do I stay feeling “peaceful” amidst these somewhat annoying “little” (yet feeling big) annoyances? And of course, these go across the board to handling those much “larger” things. that crop up in life that leave us feeling anxious, restless and/or jaded.

Practice peace – consciously “breathe peace” (slow, steady, even in-breath and out-breath), “move peace” (slowly, graceful, elegant, smooth) and “posture peace”. (stand or lie in a more relaxed manner). Reduce any breathing patterns, movement or postural stances that feel stiff, starchy, stilted or stressed.

“Everything’s gonna be alright.” We need to learn to chill and ask ourselves, “Does it really matter?’ and we need to get beyond our judgement of what is good or bad, success or failure. Another great question to ask when making a decision that is difficult, ask yourself, “Does this possible solution feel light or heavy?” Go for things that make you feel light.

Always know that life isn’t a straight line, but rather is filled with ups and downs. Our so-called difficult moments and experiences are often the ones that change our lives for the better. Nothing lasts for ever – a sobering thought when you feel like it is heading downhill at a fast rate of knots.

Count your blessings. Focus on what it going well and how you are blessed. When we look at our lives and situations, not as a test to be managed, but as an opportunity for spiritual growth, then we can sit more “peacefully”. I also find enormous strength and peace by connecting to my Higher Source of peace – knowing that I am constantly supported, guided and resourced when I connect in this way.

Every emotion is a useful indicator. Anger often spurs us into action. Annoyance often gets us clear on what we want or need. Stress is simply saying something is not in balance. Outbursts easily tell us what is not working or desired. Joy is often something that springs from living our passion. Emotions are great clues – guiding us into a more peace-full life.

Feb 24

0

Sometimes we have to cut our own leash to have the life we dream of!

By janellefletcher | body love & body image, health & well-being, manifesting & abundance, relationships, intimacy & sex, self esteem & self confidence, Written Articles | No Comments

One thing I am passionate about and gutsy at (or so I’ve been told!) is expanding my own horizons and taking leaps of faith into the unknown. Therefore I can’t help but help people unlock their own cage door and fly, or using this analogy, cut their own leash to live more freely, vibrantly and enjoying their life more. By cage I mean things like a cage of un-confidence, body dissatisfaction, poor health and no energy, mundane job, creative hibernation, not really using your talents to their fullest or giving up on your real dreams, as examples. Not only that, but I love to help people see completely new possibilities out there they have not even imagined for themselves – healthier health, revved up relationships, juicier jobs, babies they desire, creative endeavours, adventure opportunities, fun family moments and new travel tales.

Sometimes however, like having a leash attached, we go around feeling dragged down, tolerating our “miserable” or “undesirable” situation and unable to enjoy the freedom to enjoy life the way we want to, or how we imagined it would be.

Key thing is, our leash doesn’t come from outside of ourselves which we would like to think it does (or blame!). eg, working for a boss, job commitment required, better to have a partner than none at all type thinking, limiting beliefs, not enough money, family responsibilities, not enough experience……Yes all indeed factors, and yes possibly limiting, but not “unbreakable”.

5 key things today in my own learning about living a great “unleashed” life is this.

1.It takes balls to cut the leash yourself, but when you choose that, it’s empowering! Suddenly you feel like you are the “master of your destiny” rather than being lead to places you don’t want to go.

2. Much like a dog, follow your curiosity. (ie your heart) for it will show you the way. Too often our mind gets in the way of unleashing our possibilities. Listen to the “bark” inside you which is trying to voice how it wants you to live your life.

3. You might cut the leash yourself, but you don’t have to go it alone. Dogs love to play with other dogs! There are so many resources out there to help you. As someone famous said (so famous I can’t quite remember their name!), “It’s not a lack of resources out there, it’s a lack of resourcefulness.” Get resourceful, ask for the help you need and find fellow “dogs” who are also desiring a new playing field, and go have some fun sniffing around a few trees and playing ball together!!!

4. Don’t let fear be your master. It doesn’t have to control you, and is based largely on your stories of the past or your worry for the future you haven’t even had yet. What a waste of energy!!! A dog doesn’t worry about yesterday and it’s not concerned about tomorrow. It just loves to be a dog, doing what dogs do best – playing, exploring and having fun!

5. Dogs hardly ever sit still. Take some action today that will be the beginning steps of you “unleashing something different in you and your life.”

As someone who loves to bark (ie talk, encourage, share, motivate, inspire, sing, challenge……) I would also love to hear you bark and tell us about one little action you are taking, or have taken, that has liberated you in some area of your life. It could be just the enCOURAGEment that someone else needs to make a new courageous decision, or take new courageous action, that could radically change their lives.