This week I felt my skin tighten, my hands go up in despair and my heart wrench again as I read an article from yet another “up and coming modern day woman” who is putting out a new online programme about getting shit done (GSD) and flagging the “emotional stuff”.
GSD is becoming a sought after disease in my eyes and it ignores the inherent nature of who we are in our feminine, and it also negates the positives of emotional expression, inner self worth and also the need or desire for a softer way of living life.
Ladies, from years of playing superwoman and becoming a burnt-out, unwell superwoman for a time, I now know we don’t always have to do, do, do. There is another way to feel successful without a tick-off list. And how many of us women cry for a rest or retreat but keep going – fighting the feminine who is crying out for more pleasure and less pain, more rest and less stress and more ease and less disease in our mind and in our spirit?
The feminine is “curves” – not just ploughing the straight lines of a field day in and day out, not just keeping the stiff upper lip while you are a blithering mess and not simply pleasing or appeasing others with your “brilliant efforts”, while ignoring your own self-care or natural ebb and flow of emotions.
And how about this?
- Imagine telling your teenage daughter when her relationship breaks up “Don’t worry darling, just get over it and get on with finding the next boyfriend” instead of allowing her to feel sad, pine and get the comfort and support she desires from you.
- It also doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that suppressed emotions don’t stay suppressed forever. Ignoring them, by getting on with life and ploughing on is not helpful. One day emotions will show their head in unwellness, in a massive tantrum, life crisis or some other guise.
- And GSD, I believe, is another from of escapism – much like being attached at the hip to your phone or social media posts. We lose sight of the real world, and we lose our connection and deeper intimacy with people we actually used to, or presently claim to care about because we are simply too busy GSD’ing.
- And what’s more is that GSD is a masculine way of measuring our success. We think we have to get stuff done, ticked off and accomplished in a time-frame and manner that warrants approval from yourself or others. The feminine in us knows, from a deep inner space, that self approval is the biggest measure of success whether we are doing loads, or doing nothing, whether we are looking our best or not, and whether we look like we “have it sorted” or whether we are fumbling around for awhile. And actually, why do we have to build an empire right here, right now when other things may be more important, more pressing or more up your alley in terms of what you actually value?
- And GSD – helps us block out the pain of change, grief or transition – where the actual gold is. How many women do you know who have had cancer, to then finally have the “aha” moment that there is more to life than business, GSD, success in the material world and being the next “biggest and brightest woman” offering the planet something. Sometimes, success is in the simple.
Food for thought ladies. Here’s to doing less, so we can have more.
Hey gorgeous, I would love you to send me what this post has sparked within you by sending me an email at janelle@janellefletcher.com or by posting a comment at the somebody beautiful facebook community.
And if you love this blog wisdom, why not share it with a friend using the social media links below?
And if you haven’t already, go to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website, upcoming events, coaching/healing options and updates on my up-coming book – Dancing in her own Full Moonlight – the ebb and flow of being fully woman. See you there!
Janelle Fletcher www.janellefletcher.com
Yesterday was Mother’s Day and as a mother of many (6 in fact!) I have a love-hate relationship with Mother’s Day. Some years I have gone in to the day with huge expectations and have come out feeling a little less than acknowledged or “pleasured”. Other days, like yesterday, I decided to drop the expectations and just make the most of taxi-driving to my son’s soccer game and then doing the pick-ups and drop-offs for my daughter and her friend. Not a great alternative to fine wining, dining, resting, coffee-ing or abandoning responsibilities that a mother secretly craves, but it was a conscious decision to enjoy the day no matter what and not rely on someone else to make it a good one.
So yes, my day ended out being a good one – in fact, a simple, yet pleasurable day enjoying my son finally getting a full game on the field and excelling – making me and himself proud, after weeks of spending half of the game on the bench. I had a nice (pre-game) walk with another mum and retold stories and recollections of women we knew who had been through some tragedies when it comes to being mum including loss of kids – in particular through accident, death and suicide, and we were reminded to be incredibly grateful for our kids who are still with us. And the afternoon, the pick-ups and drop-offs were far more pleasant than they could have been, and my son and I filled in time eating monstrous Movenpick ice-creams at the beach. Pleasant yes. Filled stomach, for sure!
But is was into the night when the “darkness” caught up with me – that is, my seething pain around my ex-husband not supporting the kids financially and the huge strain that is on me. It heightened my emotions around the fact that it’s ME, and not him that turns up for every occasion with the kids. It is me who feeds them, reminds them to do their homework, snuggles in bed with them, teaches them how to cook, shows them the way of the world…..He is an absent parent in more ways than one, and sometimes this makes my blood boil.
So I went to bed seething and I woke up feeling depressed, like an after-match hangover. And I stayed this way most of the day.
But what has this got to do with selling my jewellery? Well it’s a Taurus New Moon – a bit of a clean slate time and a reminder to let some of the past go. So this morning I ploughed through my jewellery box and found bits and pieces that my ex had given me or pieces that I had bought when I was grieving our separation, divorce and humble times…and I have decided to sell them, clear the energy and any of my “emotional umbilical cord” to that era of my past and the expectation that he support me in the way I feel I would love as a woman, mother to “our” kids and as sole parent to them now. I can hear my inner self saying, “For crying out loud. If you can’t send over money, at least tell me how grateful you are that I’m so flippin’ amazing!” but my self worth requires me not to rely on someone else for that or hang around wasting time with baited-breath for something different.
So diamonds, sapphires, garnets and silver…I loved you, I love you, but I allow you to go now as an act of cleaning my slate on this new moon and allowing new energies and emotions to rise within me and for new experiences to reveal themselves as the moon waxes once again. I am so pleased that life waxes and wanes and allows us to rejuvenate.
Hey gorgeous, I would love you to send me what this post has sparked within you by sending me an email at janelle@janellefletcher.com or by posting a comment at the somebody beautiful facebook community.
And if you love this blog wisdom, why not share it with a friend using the social media links below?
And if you haven’t already, go to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website, upcoming events, coaching/healing options and updates on my up-coming book – Dancing in her own Full Moonlight – the ebb and flow of being fully woman. See you there!
Janelle Fletcher www.janellefletcher.com
Last night I had a bonfire. It was to end my proverbial Tour of Duty of being dutiful wife and mother.
How did this come about?
Well a simple “domestic” got the fire ignited, but the fuel has been added for quite some time actually. In fact years of mothering and playing second fiddle.
So, here’s what happened. A couple of days during the school holidays where I got a welcome couple of days minus kids, I slackened on the “cleaning dishes” front – preferring to take it easy and put other things up the priority list that were important for ME to get ticked off.
Partner, God bless him, came home and had an almighty “spaz” (Do we still use this word?) and didn’t say it, but inferred that I (or perhaps my kids who left for their brief holiday) were lazy. Or that’s at least how I read/heard the situation. He proceeded to pour me a wine and make huge noises and grunts as he washed the dishes and wouldn’t allow me to do anything. A little passive-aggressive I felt. Well, that did it for me and I didn’t appreciate this sentiment like my “duties” hadn’t been properly completed and that I should be reprimanded. I knew full well my rationale behind leaving the dishes dirty on the bench and I loved abandoning my “responsibilities” for a short time of rebellion and well-needed rest.
Well this little tete-a-tete (yes my partner is french, and no, I don’t know how to put the little accent marks on these words!) was the fuel to get my fire of rage lit and started my final bid to end my many years of Tour of Duty on the wife and motherhood front. I love the feminine. I love serving others. I love doing those little things that make a difference for man and child. But I have more recently felt the tug of my heart saying “enough Janelle, enough!”. “Do something for you. Your 6 kids don’t always need you to always think of them first. They need to learn to do more stuff for themselves. And don’t keep being like your mum who was also dutiful wife, mother and probably lover who never considered her own needs first.”
So I did it. I gathered wood, I carried it to the outdoor fire and I lovingly and determinedly made the stand that it I have completed my final Tour of Duty and that I relinquish the habit/pattern/obsession/big heart that continues to have me serving others before myself.
- It is not with Duty that I do what I will do, but out of Desire.
- It is not for others’ approval that I will do things. I will put whatever calls me through my self-approval filter and know I am enough, OK and even loveable even when I appear a little “selfish” or slacken on “what needs done.”
- It is not with silenced grimace and growing resentment that I allow others to take advantage of my kindness and generosity in my personal and biz life. It is out of self-love that I now learn to say “no” to others and “yes” to more of me and have better boundaries.
And so the fire ignited and I smiled as I ended my Tour of Duty and started my Tour of Personal Desire. Do you want to join my tour?
Hey gorgeous, I would love you to send me what this post has sparked within you by sending me an email at janelle@janellefletcher.com or by posting a comment at the somebody beautiful facebook community.
And if you love this blog wisdom, why not share it with a friend using the social media links below?
And if you haven’t already, go to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website, upcoming events, coaching/healing options and updates on my up-coming book – Dancing in her own Full Moonlight – the ebb and flow of being fully woman. See you there!
Janelle Fletcher www.janellefletcher.com
Do you know the Aretha Franklin song “Natural Woman”? Listen to it here. 
My favourite lyrics are these:
When my soul was in the lost-and-found
You came along to claim it
And that got me thinking.
Do we need some “other person” to help us feel like a natural woman? And what is a “natural woman”?
As always I simply give you my humble perspective, but for me, my experience of feeling lost for numbers of years, lead me down a dark path. Where did that lost feeling come from? From not feeling included, from feeling different and from feeling very alone. My soul simply felt lost and didn’t know where to find itself or find its place.
During that period of teenagehood where I isolated myself within the world of academia and imprisonment of eating disorders and the secrecy and privacy of that, I really did not feel womanly, and certainly not a “natural” woman. And the same goes following my marriage split when I felt so alone and humbled to little.
If I reflect on womanliness, in those two periods of my life, I found myself dressing quite asexually. My religious upbringing also herded me into less than “natural-free-spirited-woman clothing”.
I didn’t enjoy fluidity in my body. Yes I played some sport and yes I did my daily walking, but I did not feel the flowing, flirtatious and fun-induced movement in my step as a “natural woman” would.
I did not learn the art of make-up, and therefore opted for “natural.”
During my singledom I opted for what I call “mechanical” sex. Some would call it “friends with benefits”. This, for me, is not natural. Love-making within a loving relationship is. Allowing myself since then to learn fuller sexual expression is the freedom I gift myself and another as I learn to embrace more of my “natural womanliness”. It is an interesting path to explore such vulnerability, nakedness and naturalness with another.
A natural woman oozes femininity – but that is not something I was schooled in, role-modelled or had the option of exploring until years after my marriage split, when I started to see some light. Dresses and shoes and sexy lingerie, I chose to enjoy. Being less controlling and more receptive became my way of being. Seeking someone to compliment my femininity became my yearning – in the sense of finding a man in his own natural strong masculinity.
I guess when I think about the lyrics, my soul was in the lost and found department and yes I was desiring someone, not to come and “claim me”, but for two souls – each complete – to find each other and create a brand new “whole”. And this is what happened after years of patience, finding my own wholeness and learning to be more of my “natural” self – void of too many material possessions, too much “baggage” and too many tick-charts of what my ideal soulmate would be like.
And what do I think about someone claiming my soul that was lost? I’m not sure it’s the right word. For me it felt more that we found each other and we are each part of each other’s soul healing and we are both part of finding ourselves again in a new light. Yeah to that and the joys and challenges that brings us!
Where have all the flowers gone? A song from way-back just popped into my head as I wondered what muse would flow out of me today? In fact I don’t even know if I was a twinkling in my mum’s eye when that song came out, but I can certainly remember the melody. What springs forth from that little ditty (profound and political however!), came the question, “Where has all my female-ness gone?”
I ask myself, what brought that odd question on? Well, I’ve been doing this writing experience – in fact I’m smack back in the middle of it – and it’s called Re-Wilding. It’s really all about getting back the “wild”, the “fiery”, the “inappropriate” and “range of emotions” ME back again.
Because ladies, we have learned to tame ourselves. We want more pleasure, but we deny ourselves of it by distancing or distracting ourselves. We would love to vent what’s really hot and fiery inside, but we “behave ourselves” for fear of offending someone. We would love to be “given to”, have “me time” or indulge in some free time, but we think we have to act all super-man-ish doing everything ourselves and there’s no way we could enjoy some “frivolous” time having more fun.
It’s also much deeper than that. It’s what has lead us to feel misplaced in such a patriarchal world where we have lost ourselves, or can no longer find that deep, intuitive, impulsive, feeling, wild-woman healer within us. We listen to the media – I call it the external media – rather than our inner journalist for solutions to our day-to-day life and its myriad of challenges. We focus on work and getting ahead, versus serving and offering our inner gifts of presence, compassion and love for life. We fit things around a tight schedule, versus aligning with our monthly and seasonal rhythms, succumbing to the beat of someone else’s drum and not our own natural pace. We spend time within our home and work environment far more than in the natural elements. Our feelings of inadequacy are masked and “under-wraps” to keep up with the Jones’ family or to appear as good as Mrs Entrepreneur or another “amazing mum” when really we are feeling exhausted, under the weather and possibly quite soul-discontented.
The masculine and the patriarchy squashes us. The feminine expands us. The masculine tames us. The feminine tempts and teases us playfully. And the masculine freezes us. The feminine feels. She is feisty. She is honest. She is indulgent. She is receptive. She is wild. She loves to dance and have pleasures. She yearns to be unleashed.
So what have I personally noticed during this phase of Re-Wilding? I have learned that I often avoid the darkness, depths and the dive-down deep moments, in favour of hoping life can simply be easier and better without me doing anything, or preferring to “stay positive” with all of my self-help strategies. I have opted for staying relatively quiet and “good-girly” when it comes to my family dynamics even though I know I could change things by bravely speaking out even if they ostracized me further. I have tamed my movement, my sexuality and my vitality doing monotony, routine and stuff that kills my spirit, rather than makes my soul sing. I have allowed my creative spirit to be dampened and put on the back-burner by prioritizing others over myself. I have also largely been “in control” of my life (and people), but I am soooooo (and might I add an extra “o”) learning that I have no control over it/them really, and I would be better off surrendering and “letting go”. Ladies, we talk about that, but do we really do it?
So today I have no answers, no tips and no advice. For that really is the masculine.
I just however invite you, woman to woman, to share one of your “life stories” that is full of emotion and express that story somehow in poetry, song, on top of a mountain top, with a sage stick in hand, or even howling to the moon. The wild woman in you wants to become unharnessed, unsilenced and finally given permission to be less than “appropriate”.
If you love this blog wisdom, why not share it with a friend?
And how about also sharing your “story” here or at our somebody beautiful facebook community?
And if you haven’t already, go to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website, upcoming events, coaching/healing options and updates on my up-coming book – Dancing in her own Full Moonlight – the ebb and flow of being fully woman. See you there!
Janelle Fletcher
I exploded this week – in fact I had a huge emotional melt-down! It appeared out of nowhere as a sudden unexplained outburst at the drop of a hat – actually the drop of a few words by my partner that fuelled me into a lit dynamite stick. Ka-boooomb!!!
Yes, I am menstrual AND peri-menopausal, and hormones are playing havoc – or should I say doing what they are supposed to be doing – allowing me to be more aware (because they are now becoming so crystal clear) of the undertones of what is important and unimportant in my life now as I go through “the change”. Change into my authentic self that has me finally looking after my needs and less of others’ needs – unfamiliar territory, and no doubt there are a few landmines ahead.
But my emotional melt-down looked far from beautiful. It was an ugly scene. It was loud. It was explosive. It was nasty even. And my partner copped it all – in the form of me escaping the nest for a night and me finally after 24 hours of self-indulgence and time out, carrying my tail between my legs and humbly returning home feeling far from gorgeous.
So is it OK for a woman, who has long constrained her emotions, who has long given to others before herself and who is exhausted to her core because of over-giving, over-doing and not getting nearly enough sleep, to have such an emotional melt-down, and could that be considered beautiful?
I want to say YES, because the world would have us say NO. Society teaches us that we women need to wear the mask of emotional constraint (that generally looks like a constant smile on our face), keep the strait jacket of motherhood on without a bid for freedom now and then, and to be a loving and sexy woman, lover or partner in an always pleasant and upbeat way.
Let me feel into how we can be beautiful even when we are feeling a little worse for wear – generally by our own doing (or believing) of the above.
- Have personal SELF CARE as number one in your life. This is still an ongoing lesson for me because I am a heart-felt, mother Goddess who has concern and compassion for others. Not a bad thing, but it is when self-care is not up the agenda. What could self-care look like for me as I write? More time out with my girlfriends (yes restaurant booked for next week!), a good solid 5 days away regularly being pampered or doing very little (end of March feels the right time!), a charitable trip overseas (could be my 50th birthday treat) and some money spent on anything that will help my long-term insomnia problem. It’s time! And let’s throw in some good laughter-inducing activities that will re-ignite my pleasure burner – which will also help me ooze my beauty more!
- Know that the emotional spectrum is OK and important and that I don’t need to hide any emotions, because they come out in the wash anyway – especially in the form of resentment, bitterness, jealousy and other such lovelies – if unexpressed earlier in a more moderate form. As woman, we have been given our menstrual cycle as a perfect model for the ups and downs, life’s curveballs and need to honour each phase of the cycle – an active, looking after others, happier and “lighter” phase, and a more inward, reflective, desperately needing care for self and one’s emotional landscape phase – typically pre-menstrually. If you are no longer menstruating, you will still have cycles of sorts, especially if you are aligned with the moon. I am so learning that my beauty lies in me being fully woman – not just an emotionally strait-jacketed woman. Jealousy tells me clearly what I want. Resentment also tells me what is important. Bliss definitely reminds me to have more of whatever is helping me feel that way. When I use these emotions wisely to direct me into a lifestyle that I will enjoy more fully, I will ooze more beauty.
- Attend to what you are wearing. An odd thing that has intuitively come to me as I type this, but it feels it has some truth to it. When I am feeling pretty, feminine, soft and colourful, I instantly feel better and indulge less in my hissy fit. If I am slothing around in my worst of track-suit pants while feeling fiery, “down” or self-pitying, I tend to indulge in that state longer, harder and deeper. So note to self: When I am having my next melt-down, put on my favourite perfume, dress in something pretty, put on my nicest of lingerie and attend to my skin and hair, not to mention paint my toenails.
So with a glass of wine in hand tonight, my feet up after a hard days’ work, a night out at a restaurant with my love and hopefully a good sleep, I choose to see my beauty in all of this no matter what.
If you love this wisdom, why not share with a friend? And how about leaving a comment on what you are going to do to look, feel and grow more beautiful?
If you want more, head to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website.
We also have a somebody beautiful facebook community – a gorgeous place for gorgeous women to commune daily! Why not, come over and join us?
Reading an issue of MindFood yesterday (one of my Christmas pressies to self) I came across a title, “I don’t want to grow younger. I want to grow my beautiful.” I might add that I want to embrace,more than ever, my feminine after years of being far more “practical” in my attire, my work, my schedule and daily routine.
Nearing my 50th this year, life is pretty good, exciting and pretty pleasurable. And I am feeling good about me and my body. Yes it is aging somewhat – or should I simply call it chaging (a.k.a changing)? And yes there is loads on the market to have me looking ever-so-slightly less wrinkled or less”saggy”, but inevitably the age counter is always counting.
But despite that, we can look, feel and grow more beautiful – not just visibly from the outside, but allowing what’s inside to shine. In fact, I believe there is nothing more alluring, magnetic, charming and irresistible when we shine our feminine and when we allow our soul to sing. Graceful Aging, I call it. So what can have us radiating extraordinary beauty as we get older? Let’s talk about 3 S’s today.
A Stillness practice There are countless studies about the effect of stress, negative thinking and the cumulative effect of a busy lifestyle on our cells that are aging, so it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that when we reduce the amount of stress, and increase our stillness practices that our cells stay more “youthful” and vibrant. Serenity also shows itself in our appearance. That slower, calmer, more relaxed look is definitely more “youthful” than an agitated, angry or stressed disposition.
Embracing your Sexual and Sensual nature No, this is not just about having more sex – the act, because quite frankly, that is not always on tap, nor sometimes desirable for whatever reason. Saying that, research does tell us that fabulous love-making (or self-exploration a.k.a masturbation) is natural “make-up” giving your skin a great glow among other benefits. I would however also like to refocus the word SEX to that of Self EXpression – conscious moving, posturing, breathing, dancing, creating, using your voice and titillating your senses with gorgeous smells, sights, textures, sensations and sounds. When we are “lit up” at that very sacred, sacral, sexual and sensual level, we vibrate beauty that is beyond just our outer appearance and our age.
Soul Food So much is focussed these days on what food we should and shouldn’t be eating to keep us looking young, fit and fab! Yes there is some merit in eating nutritiously. But I believe our body knows what it needs and doesn’t need if we only listened to it. But equally, if not more importantly, we need to feed our soul cravings. What’s your soul crying out for? Is it demanding you give up your stressful job and start a project you are really passionate about? Is it asking for more music, dancing or creative outlets? It is saying “feed me” some more adventures? Is it asking you to ditch some people in your life who “age” you, and to seek companions who love seeing you lit up and who keep you feeling young at heart? Don’t just attend to what goes in your belly. Start feeding your soul.
A soul that sings and a smile on your face is the language of beauty.
If you love this wisdom, why not share with a friend? And how about leaving a comment on what you are going to do to look, feel and grow more beautiful?
If you want more, head to www.somebodybeautiful.com and get on my mailing list to update you with more goodness and help you flourish more in self-love, body-honouring and reviving your feminine spirit. There are also some great free resources on this website.
We also have a somebody beautiful facebook community – a gorgeous place for gorgeous women to commune daily! Why not, come over and join us?
Isn’t motherhood often difficult? It brings us the deepest joys and often the deepest lows. Some reflections in poetry today and the intense feelings that we can feel as mothers, especially when our children leave home or in split/blended/separated family dynamics. I trust something resonates in you.
If something “calls you” in this writing and you “get it”, why not head to www.janellefletcher.com , enter your details and I will keep you posted in early 2016 about more writing/inspiration called The Write of Passage – a place where you can share your story, poetry, thoughts, reflections and also be updated on somebody beautiful events and a new free online self care series and a Divine Deva Ultimate Self care Experience. Or why not also head over the the somebody beautiful facebook community where women love to share their fabulous, messy, joyful, painful lives and be real and raw?
The return
My son
My son
Oh how I have missed you
Having graciously let you
Go where YOU needed to go
And not where I wanted you to be
Safe in my heart
Under my wing
And in my embrace
Of Mother love
The pain
That you are now adult
And I have missed some years
Of you becoming that man
Having walked the rite of passage
Into such extraordinary
and sometimes difficult times
Of emerging manhood
My pain of
Womanhood
Being a mother
Simply wanting to make your way
Easier
Brighter
And with a softer landing
And to hold and rock you
So you feel secure
Is entwined somewhat with my own deep desire
To feel needed, wanted and respected
On your short return
I feel intense sadness
That I have missed those few years
And I notice it even more intensely
Than when you were absent from our home
Your return has rifted my heart
And reminded me of that pain
Of letting you sail
Into unknown waters
And reminded me
Of how powerless
I have felt
To be the mumma
I wanted me to be
Not what you needed me to be
But as I shed buckets of tears
Into my well this morning
Which has for some time now
Felt dry
I am filled more with more sustenance
Admiration
Pride
And
Motherly love
Of the way
You are becoming the man
You were destined to be
And the path you have walked
Which may not have been
The trail I planned for you
But one that has shown you the way
To who you are today
You have done well my son
Minus me
In the last three years
And my cup runneth over
With respect for myself too
For the foundations I set
The seeds I planted
The water of love I sprinkled
And the ever constant knowingness
Not an easy one
But an important one
That it is not a mother who determines
How a seed grows
As much as she would like to think this
The seed himself
Grows
With his own knowingness
Inside
My youngest son turned 13 today. It’s my “birthing day” and his “birthday”. 2 great reasons to celebrate.
But it also brings to the fore some of my own “stuff” around mothering and being mothered.
Without going into too many grim details, here is a real and raw candid video that I made today about “Wow, I did it!” I finally connected with my mum and sister after years of distancing myself and in the case of my sister, complete avoidance It’s also about me, the self love and body confidence gal, taking some more leaves out of my own book when it comes to mothering myself and self care. Click out my story on this video. Mothering myself
So after watching that video, consider these two questions:
-
What are your “mothering yourself” practices that are craving to be resurrected?
-
And what womanly or motherly, daughterly or even sisterly (whether literal or figurative) connections do you want to revive for the sake of your wellness, sanity and ability to move on?
So here’s where it’s at for me.
1. Celebrate each of my kids birthdays as also my birthing days and give myself even more love and pleasure on those days. Today being my son’s birthday (and my birthing day) I even had a spa in the middle of my working day.
2. Be held more often and spend less time racing around, and more time in someone’s arms.
3. Spend more “girlie” time with my girlfriends. Laugh, drink wine and dancing sounds like fun!
4. Find out more about my mum and her “growing up” experiences.
5. Be kind to my body and rest more when I am menstruating. Honour that time to rest, rejuvenate and release.
- What are your “mothering yourself” practices that need to come out of hiding?
- And who are you going to connect with now on the “girlie” front and why?
How about you post your answers over at the somebody beautiful facebook community.