This morning, I was prompted by a woman online to fully claim my name. So what did I take that to mean and what did that make me think of? The first memory that popped into my head was something that occurred several years ago, when one night I was molested.
Without going into the whole deal, this man said my name in such a sleazy, degrading and sexual way that I really felt disempowered when I introduced myself to others. Saying my name took me back to what happened. It took me back to the deep feelings of shame, hurt and anger within my body. It makes me cry with sadness as I type as I recall the fuller story of being betrayed by a friend who believed him over me.
Some years later I was on a Presenter’s course and we were asked to participate in a simple name exercise. I wept in the “remembering”. However I also took the opportunity right there in that moment to reclaim a more assertive, powerful, louder and more confident “tone” to my name when I spoke it out. I reclaimed the love of my mother when she birthed me and gave me that special name. I declared there and then that who I am is powerful, not powerless and I am a woman of courage, not a victim of circumstance. I also honoured my unsilencing and finding my voice by going to the police even though they disappointed me in their lack of follow-though and ability to take things further.
So what’s in your name(s) that you go by, and do you want to keep, change or give your name(s) new life and energy?
As part of my workshops with women, I have often done an introduction exercise where people write down all of the names they have been given or have assumed – family name, christian name, middle name, adopted name, married name, sexual names, belittling names, teacher’s pet names, names teachers, parents, the church or community have called them, nicknames, names they have overheard people saying about them, adjectives they have been described by, names of endearment, spiritual names, names spoken over them ( eg. “I wish you were never born”), names they have called themselves and their body by and whatever else springs into their awareness when they think about name-calling including the words, tone, volume, attitude and intent behind the name.
This becomes a very powerful opportunity to feel into what names they wish to ditch, and which ones they wish to assume or give energy to again. For some, having divorced, they now wish to assume a different surname that energetically feels uplifting or right for them. For others, they wish to ditch the degrading names they have called themselves or their body, and to start speaking out more body gratitude and body positive messages, not to mention more lovingly describe their body parts. They have released sexual names – whore, bitch, frigid….through body ritual and cleansing. They have created ceremony around their new assumed name.
What does this spark within you today? What is your intuitive voice sounding out for you to consider when it comes to names – for better and for worse? What names are denying you of being fully fabulous?
For me I thank the woman this morning who prompted this enquiry. I claimed the name “vibrant, courageous femme extraordinaire”. I also thank another woman who shared this picture – Your vibe attracts your tribe. This helped me feel into what my vibe and tribe is and I claim these as part of my name today.
I am real, vibrant, authentic, alive, natural, feminine, sensual, courageous, simple, graceful, elegant, open-hearted and shining my unique light, love and loveliness.
Wow, what an awesome name!
Hey gorgeous, I would love you to send me what this post has sparked within you by sending me an email at janelle@janellefletcher.com or by posting a comment at the somebody beautiful facebook community.
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Janelle Fletcher www.janellefletcher.com